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The Lust Dare

For all of my faithful readers, I want to apologize for my absence over the last month or more. The last month has brought to my door the largest storm and troubles I have ever met. I have been pummeled in the last 5 weeks with greater grief, tears, struggles, anger, fear, and confusion than I have ever faced in the past. And it really isn't going to end anytime soon. Lessen, yes. But end? Not really.

That is my apology for not blogging, but I really want to share something new with you all. I had this new thought today, and an area that I believe God is calling me to minister in. I tend to be the kind of person who will have new ideas as such all the time, and so I immediately took this idea to God and asked Him whether it was from Him or not. To be honest, I even gave him a fleece as Gideon did in the Bible. I said "If this is from you, then make it clear in this way, and if it is not from you, than make that clear in this way." Barely minutes later He answered my fleece.

Yes, this new idea is very exciting, but it also scares the wits out of me. Because it requires me to share something that I really rather would not tell anyone. It requires me to share the largest sin I ever struggled with. But that also means I get to share my victory over it. Still, it is very scary to me, and the Devil has been fighting it all afternoon. Even as I write this, I am shaking slightly, and my pulse is pretty elevated.

This new idea will make the most sense to those of you who have seen the film Fireproof. In the film, the main character has this book that is called The Love Dare. After the movie came out, the makers of the film also actually wrote a Love Dare book that many couples read and use today. Well, I am calling my new idea The Lust Dare.  And it is for those girls specifically, who battle with lust in any of its different forms. Each day there will be a challenge, or a dare, and there will be scripture and something to read, just as The Love Dare uses. It really is a similar format. Disclaimer: The format of The Lust Dare is not of my own making, but rather is based off of The Love Dare by Alex and Stephen Kendrick, who get the credit for that. 

You can read more about how to use or become part of The Lust Dare in my post: How to Use "The Lust Dare."

So without further ado: The first day of The Lust Dare.



Day #1: Accountability is Key



“If they fall, one will lift up his companion. But woe to him who is alone when he falls, for he has no one to help him up”  -Ecclesiastes 4:10



Accountability is the most important aspect in the battle against the lust of the flesh. Without it, you are setting yourself up for failure. That was very evident in my battle against the flesh.



My struggle with lust was not obvious to me and pretty subtle until a few months before my 18th birthday. After 2 years of working at a book shop, I picked up my first secular romance novel. I skimmed its pages, but when I came across more steamy(intimate) passages, I snapped the book shut. But then a week later I picked up another one and let myself read a little more.



Over the next few weeks I would pick up books and skim the pages till I found more steamy parts. As I came from a conservative and Christian home, I would have moments where I was like “Oh, that is too much, I shouldn’t read pieces like that.” But as the weeks went by, my boundaries for what was ok fell farther and farther from the truth, and the line just kept being drawn farther and farther back.



I realized this, and decided I really needed to stop. So I confessed to God, and as my biggest fear was my parents figuring out what I was doing, I promised God that if I did it again I would tell my parents. Well, this worked for a couple of weeks, but then I picked up another book and the whole process started all over again; except my boundaries sunk even farther this time.



I would constantly feel ugly, and impure, and would hate myself for what I was doing. And I would promise myself time and time again that if I didn’t stop that I would tell my parents. Sometimes this would help me stop for a week or two, but then eventually I always went back to the same sin. And even the boundary for what it was that I had to stop fell farther and farther back.



After months of this torture and of hating myself, God hit me upside the head with a two-by-four. I finally broke down and told my parents. They were shocked, and wounded. But they were wounded for and with me. They cried with me, they encouraged me in my resolution to put a stop to it once and for all, and they quickly became firm accountability partners. They checked on me so frequently in those first few months that I would have to lie straight out to get around telling them if I picked up another book.



After that, I was all of the sudden able to actually fight the battle and deny the temptation. Knowing that when I got home from the book shop, my parents were going to ask me about it made me not even want to grab a book most days. Granted, many days I had to literally sit on my hands to stop from grabbing a book off a shelf, but that accountability made all the difference.

Joshua Harris says in his book, Not Even a Hint, that “No matter how strong you might feel right now or how much victory over lust you’re presently experiencing, you won’t make it very long on your own. In the battle against lust, lone rangers end up dead rangers. They might look impressive riding off into the sunset by themselves, but when an ambush comes they are without help.”



Do not become fooled and believe that you can fight this battle on your own. You need accountability, and God has already given you two wonderful partners in your parents. I know that for some of you, that may be a more difficult option, as you may only have one parent that you live with, or your parents may not be believers. But God has placed your parents there for a reason.  You may be scared out of your wits to talk to them about such things, but they are there to draw alongside you and help you in this battle. I very strongly recommend that your parents be the first person that you go to for accountability, and others that might help in your battle should come after that.



“And a threefold cord is not quickly broken.” –Ecclesiastes 4:12



Today’s Dare

Go to your parents, or if that is really not an option, a close godly friend, and tell them of your struggle. Ask them to come alongside you and keep you accountable. Even if that is as simple as asking you how your thought life is going and how they can pray for you, such accountability is exactly the tool that will help you to move forward and to take arms against the flesh and its desires.

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